Skip to main content

AN ANNOYING HABIT



 “How do you find your husband, dear?” asked mom to Jaya over phone. Jaya was in Hyderabad after marriage.

The newlywed Jaya giggled and said shyly, “He’s good, mom. I like him a lot.”

“That’s nice to hear,” said mom.

“Only that he has one or two annoying habits…nothing important-will tell you when we meet next. And ha… he is coming over to Chennai alone next week on some official work…you can meet him then.”

“Sure. We will receive Pradeep at the station.”
***

Pradeep looked around the three tier A/c compartment with irritation. He hated three tiers-they were so full of people of every description-There was this large old lady with a large three storied tiffin carrier enough probably for the whole coach. She was accompanied by an immensely fat boy who kept looking longingly at the tiffin carrier. The appetizing smells emanating from there annoyed Pradeep even more as Jaya’s frugal dinner had already evaporated from his tummy.

Luckily Pradeep got a lower berth which he was determined not to exchange with anyone this time-however senior the citizen be.

Just as he was curling up with a book, he heard someone call, “Saaaar!” He looked up and saw that the tiffin carrier lady was addressing him…The fat boy had meanwhile practically emptied the carrier contents and was looking ruefully like Alexander who thought he had no more places to conquer.

“Saar, can you please exchange your lower berth with the middle one above you? My son has a problem…?
“What! Exchange with that young fellow! Never! Forget it,” Pradeep almost shouted.

“Okay saaar, no need to shout,” said the lady, giving him a strange look. Pradeep felt a strange sense of premonition as the lady’s look seemed to imply, ‘Don’t say I didn’t warn you.’

Finally lights were out and most passengers went to sleep. The train would reach Chennai in the early hours if on time. Some were busy with their smarties. The fat boy took position above Pradeep’s berth after giving him an ugly look. The middle berth groaned and protested, but to Pradeep’s relief, didn’t collapse on him.

As the night advanced, the train picked up speed and the passengers were sound asleep, Pradeep included. The latter dreamt that he was in the bathroom of a five star hotel enjoying a good shower. It was almost dawn when he saw the dream and it felt so real that he woke up with a start. Then he realized in shock that the ‘shower’ was indeed from the berth above!

Now Pradeep understood the quaint look given by the fat boy’s mother! When Pradeep examined himself, he was further horrified to see that the wetness was exactly where it would have been had he himself---ugh! The boy’s aim was so perfect as though he had taken help of GPS!

There was no time for any ‘corrective action’ as the train was already approaching Chennai station. Pradeep cursed himself for preferring to wear a short, smart modern shirt which reached up to his waist only-With Jaya’s parents already on the prowl looking for him on the platform, he knew there was no place to hide.

***


After receiving their son-in-law, Jaya’s parents were walking behind him as he went ahead carrying his briefcase.
“Did you see…?” asked Jaya’s mom as her husband hastily silenced her; “Shhh… be careful, he’s gonna hear!” said he and whispered, “I had a quick discreet glance- This must certainly be one of the problems annoying Jaya!”










Comments

Popular posts from this blog

RIGHT WRONG

Seeing her eyes glow in excitement,
Obviously though she has it all wrong,
I rush to grab the correction opportunity,

Till I have another look at the gleam in her eyes.

Hell, I think, let me be wrong a hundred times over,
If only to preserve that glorious joy,

Rather than prove her wrong
And watch her enthusiasm wither.

A RUMMY TALE

As he lay there, wallowing in stale rum and self-pity, know not how long;
The red-eyed monster sprang up suddenly from the brimming liquor;
Gulping down a glass of liquid fire, he roared, “Now! Shoot her now!”
“She deserves no pity- who has let you down so badly.”

Drowning in rum, he attempted to raise his head,
Raising placatory hands to his personal devil,
“Now, now, let us not go there, so afar!
Remember, she used to be my cynosure till week last,
It’s just a pity that she was charmed by someone else.”

“Beware if you show any mercy to that unfaithful wretch!”
Growled the beast, spitting out shards of glass in disgust and adding,
“Be a man, take the sharpest knife and plunge it in her heartless heart.”

He cried out loud and pleaded with folded hands,
“No, no, can’t ever do that, please for Heaven’s sake, go away.”
“Then you leave me with no other option,” sighed the monster,
Stabbing him straight through the heart.

“Cardiac arrest due to excessive sorrow and stress”-
-declared t…

THULABARAM

There is, in the Lord's Abode in Guruvayoor,
A common balance for weighment of offerings.

It's called Thulabaram.

Only, it is anything but common.

A priest there is entrusted the task
Of weighing the offerings you committed
To Lord Krishna.

It may be a few kilos of some vegetable
Or fruit, grains or sugar or what you will.


But it got to be necessarily what you committed!

For,

Have seen with my own eyes
The priest struggling to weigh
A couple of kilos or maybe three
Of a certain vegetable, think it was yam.

But it simply wouldn't balance, though he
Kept on heaping the yam on it!

Then, on the priest's asking,
The devotee said he had thought
Of a different vegetable, maybe raw banana,

But had settled for yam since he couldn't
Get the banana.

The priest quickly removed the yam
Asked the devotee to be back
With the vegetable committed!

Only then, the priest said with conviction,

The weighment would happen.