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TWO VENERABLES

Gentleman, Gentlemen, Greeting, Hands



Two venerable old professors they were,
Very intelligent and knowledgeable indeed.
But their minds being always among equations and diagrams-
 -Were generally absent from mundane present circumstances.

One day, these two gentlemen at the local railway station,
Were fighting real hard with their respective memories,
And with each other too,
Trying to figure out which among them
Was supposed to board the train,
And which one had come
To see the other off.

Alas, by the time they could agree,
The train chugged in, increasing their worry.
But lo! Soon came their savior, a common friend,
Briefcase in hand, smiling and waving at them.

The two professors rushed to him beaming in joy,
Not just on seeing him but for resolving their dilemma.
But before they could thank him, they saw, to utter dismay,
The train had started chugging off!

“Come, come,” they shouted, and dragged him by the hand,
Without listening to his protestations, they pushed him into a coach.
Last thing they heard from him, to their great surprise was,
“I just got down here, you fools!
You were supposed to receive me here.” 









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LINGUA-WOES

A Tamil gentleman nearly got clobbered when he appreciated the food served for lunch at his Telugu friend’s place.

The poor guy innocently said ‘Pramadham’ which means ‘Excellent’ in Tamil, but unfortunately means ‘Danger’ in Telugu!

‘Tamasha’ means ‘light stuff’, ‘Comedy’ etc in Malayalam, but beware if you use it flippantly with the Hindi speaking people.

Indiscreet use of this word- which means a street dance or something in Hindi- is not received kindly by them.

The simple word ‘Avasar’- which also is a Sanskrit root word- means ‘Occasion’ in Hindi; ‘Avasaram’ means ‘Requirement’ in Telugu; ‘Opportunity’ in Malayalam and ‘Hurry’ in Tamil!

There must of course be several such examples in the various languages ‘spooken’ in our delightful India.




RIGHT WRONG

Seeing her eyes glow in excitement,
Obviously though she has it all wrong,
I rush to grab the correction opportunity,

Till I have another look at the gleam in her eyes.

Hell, I think, let me be wrong a hundred times over,
If only to preserve that glorious joy,

Rather than prove her wrong
And watch her enthusiasm wither.

THULABARAM

There is, in the Lord's Abode in Guruvayoor,
A common balance for weighment of offerings.

It's called Thulabaram.

Only, it is anything but common.

A priest there is entrusted the task
Of weighing the offerings you committed
To Lord Krishna.

It may be a few kilos of some vegetable
Or fruit, grains or sugar or what you will.


But it got to be necessarily what you committed!

For,

Have seen with my own eyes
The priest struggling to weigh
A couple of kilos or maybe three
Of a certain vegetable, think it was yam.

But it simply wouldn't balance, though he
Kept on heaping the yam on it!

Then, on the priest's asking,
The devotee said he had thought
Of a different vegetable, maybe raw banana,

But had settled for yam since he couldn't
Get the banana.

The priest quickly removed the yam
Asked the devotee to be back
With the vegetable committed!

Only then, the priest said with conviction,

The weighment would happen.